Life is a Never-Ending Buffet

I hate buffets.

I've never enjoyed the idea of a place where you could eat endlessly because I always felt like it was an injustice to those who do not have that kind of choice on the other side of the globe. On top of that, individuals splurge in buffets; getting more than they could possibly finish and leaving what's left to waste because there just was not enough room in their stomachs to stuff the food down their throats. The rest is trash, when it didn't need to be. It is like spilling water in front of people who were dehydrated; their life before their eyes. And the consumerism that buffets reflect.... I feel like I can go on forever. But I had an interesting experience while I've been taking on adulthood here in my first full-time job. I began to feel like life was a never-ending buffet.

It was Thursday of this week. I was as busy as ever planning out my Sunday sermon, editing the youth club applications, making sure my intern was staying occupied with his responsibilities, and thinking about budgeting. Just, the whole gamut. It was lunchtime. Normally, we would eat lunch together as a staff. Someone would cook for all the staff members who were in the office, and we would sit down together for a break. We had a Filipino soup with rotisserie chicken and white rice. It was incredibly delicious and filling. I was particularly grateful this day because I began to realize how many times I have been fed without having to pay for my food. It was so abundant that I've lost count of the number. I knew, when I was young, that one could never feed oneself because one simply did not have the financial stability to do so. The caretaker -- in my case, my parents -- did the feeding. I was content with that, willingly accepting their gift of feeding me. Though, like any independent child would feel, I always eagerly anticipated the moment when I would be able to feed myself. I always believed that once I began earning a sufficient paycheck, I'd be my own caretaker. I would never be fed anymore by someone else.

And isn't that how we feel about our lives as Christians? As we are young, we soak everything up like a sponge, but as we grow older, we begin to be less open to advice, or to learning from another. We begin to see ourselves as the givers. As the one who imparts blessing, but rarely the one who receives it from another individual. We respond as if we have grown out of receiving blessings. We feed others, but have seen ourselves as growing out of being fed. We have been so consumed by this misconception that we don't even expect to be fed anymore. We've become hardened to words of encouragement, to words of exhortation, or even to inspiring stories told. We do the feeding.

But this experience sobered me. I will never stop being fed; and being fed freely.

We have this inherent rule of thumb as human beings. We love being our own masters. This is why independence feels so gratifying. Earning our own paycheck feels so gratifying. Cooking our own meal feels so gratifying. Doing our own laundry; having our own friends; paying for my own car. All of these things. We like to earn everything we have because we've grown cynical of the system of freeness. Independence is much more stable. Earning our possessions is much more stable. Paying for our own meals is much more stable.

Free food is not food we can receive.

Young or old, food will always be served at the table of Jesus Christ; and this will be given freely. And trust me, there is no other option. But the hard part follows. Will it be freely received?

We hide behind giving because our inability to receive makes us insecure. Nothing in this world is free. If we were to receive freely, it just means that a favor is to be owed.

What have we done to deserve free food? How have we earned it? Check this.

The oldest truth in the book. We don't deserve it. We have done nothing. And even if we were given the option to attempt at deserving the food, the result will remain. It is an impossibility. But free food is given yet still. And it will be given -- forever and ever; because the grace of God found in the man Jesus Christ was enough to purchase it for us. Now, through this overflowing grace, we can cut the crap. Stop pretending like you're too good for free food. Or stop allowing fear to overcome your ability to freely receive.

Jesus says come, receive.

Just like my host family says. "No rent. Come and receive."
And my titas and titos say. "No money. Come and eat."
Just as my newfound friends say. "No strings attached. Come and be loved."

They learned it from the Son of Man, Jesus; who says come, receive. This food will be given endlessly. Come. Recline at table. Eat.

And my decision? Lord, I'm going to cut the crap. I will choose to receive.